Vivian M. Nielsen, M.A.
My Story
We are, all of us, AGELESS GODDESSES.
A little about this Ageless Goddess:
- I am mid-way through my life and, like you, have a multitude of experiences that have shaped me.
- I have parented my teen son solo since he was a baby.
- I am firmly planted in the sandwich generation, supporting my father while maneuvering through the challenges of adolescence.
- My childhood foundation was built from shame.
- I have spent a great deal of my adult life looking for that very elusive happiness, in a manner many of us engage in, outside of myself.
- I am no stranger to challenges, be they relationships, work, loss, parenting, health, or computers.
I am intimately familiar with breath-stopping fear, deep insecurity, stay-in-bed depression, paralyzing anxiety, dark and dreadful self-loathing, sorrowful grief, negative body image, excruciating betrayal, brain busting anger, demeaning failure, not enoughness, invisibility, teary sadness. The journey has been fraught with sticky obstacles. Messy, emotional, confusing, downright maddening challenges.
But an important thing to know about me:
I DON’T GIVE UP.
Pain is real.
Misery is optional.
And an opportunity. What do I mean by that?
Misery, depression, anxiety, suffering–all are invitations to dive deep into our inner world, that inner voice we all house, but so often ignore because of our programming.
That authentic voice whispering to us to live aligned with our deepest values. The more we ignore it, the louder it yells, until it manifests in some physical or emotional or spiritual dis-ease.
Are you ready to listen to that inner voice?
It requires being brave, and being willing to tell your TRUTH, even if terrified.
Are you ready to tell your truth?
Are you ready to show up in your fullest authenticity?
I also now know: greater consciousness, dogged determination, the strength in my voice, true courage, the critical importance of optimal health and wellness, fierce, unconditional love, deep compassion, the liberation of a self-directed life.
This is available to all of us.
To take this path has required a lot of self-reflection, painful realizations, complete self-honesty, judgement from others, and hard decisions.
And it has been worth it.
Completely. 100%.
My Background
Minerva Coaching was born from my own transition to midlife. I am keenly interested in change and transition, especially the changes that occur with growing older, and how we respond to them. My passion lies with kicking ageism to the curb, and helping midlife women bust through judgments and doubts, both their own and those of society.
My approach encompasses mind, body and spirit. I have personally been involved for many years with mindfulness meditation, journalling/writing, dream work, dance, fitness, and gardening. These are all modalities that help lead me to inner wisdom, insights, and grounding in the present moment.
I believe in the strength and courage of women. I believe all women have a yearning and a responsibility to live true to themselves. I want women to live with JOY. To feel COMPLETE AND SATISFIED at a deep level.
“Age is just a number, and agelessness means not buying into the idea that a number determines everything from your state of health to your attractiveness to your value.”
― Christiane Northrup
A Little About Aging
A BIG thing to know about me, and a key focus of my current Coaching work:
I emphatically oppose our society’s view of aging. I am dismayed by how older people in this society are viewed and treated, especially older women. Aging is not just a biological process, but a cultural one as well, and the cultural perspective has an enormous impact on the experience of growing older. In our youth-obsessed society, aging is shamed and non-youth stripped of value. Old is bad and young is good. This dichotomy is reinforced everywhere we turn.
Then there is menopause. What is actually a natural process of a woman’s life has been depicted through history as an illness, a sign of decline and deterioration, an end to the value and usefulness of a woman.
I have had enough.
I have had enough of older individuals being treated as invisible, marginalized and useless. I have had enough of ageism being so utterly pervasive in this society. I am done with phrases like “over the hill”, “you look great for your age“, “past your prime”, “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks”. Pppphhttt…
Words associated with aging are rife with negative perceptions and implications. They erode self-confidence. They perpetuate the antiquated notion that growing older is a disease.
GROWING OLDER IS NOT A DISEASE!
Ageist attitudes hold us back from living a full, vital next half, personally and professionally. Ageist attitudes influence us to feel unattractive, undesirable and worthless. This negative view of aging impacts all facets of our health. And compels us to take sometimes drastic measures to curb the natural aging process.
SADLY, MANY BUY INTO IT.
- We think we are no longer valuable in the workplace.
- We think we are no longer competent.
- We think we are too old to fall in love.
- We think we shouldn’t be having passionate sex or sweet romance.
- We think we can’t wear short skirts!
- We think it is normal to become sedentary, to lose our muscle strength, to decline in health, to suffer dementia, and to be dependent on the medical system.
These assumptions need to be challenged. Ageist terms and phrases need to be abolished; they are wrong and damaging. Age is not a predictor of physical or mental abilities. It does not signify the inevitable deterioration of one’s health and well-being.
It needs to change.
I am DETERMINED to shift the current perception of growing older. Ageist terms are unacceptable.
Growing older is a natural state of living this life.
We can and should consider ourselves AGELESS. I do.
It is time to create our own reality while growing older. A reality that is meaningful to each one of us – on our terms. Nobody else’s.
We must pursue our own interests, find the dreams that make us tingle, believe in ourselves fully and unapologetically, trust our instincts and live them, and finally take care of ourselves the way we deserve, not determined by the culture that thinks older women should behave or think or look a certain way.
It is time to be the truest, bravest, most authentic version of yourself that you can imagine. It is time to no longer depend on the outside world to completely validate and shape your identity. To accept and even embrace the messiness of life.
OMG, HOW FREEING!
The journey is worth every scrape, bruise and tear. To honour the journey, to feel fully your experiences, to accept them and plow on ahead, that is fierce bravery.
We are all capable of FIERCE BRAVERY.
If any of this connects with you deeply, then you are in the right place for support. I am hands-down passionate about helping to guide and support women like myself to live their most authentic life. It is our time.
Let me help you.
Join me in this beautiful, emotional journey to authenticity.
You have earned it.
You deserve it. You really do.
You owe it to yourself at this point in life to be nothing but real.